here's how im living my life right now:

I start the day with school, followed by CCA.
when i reach home, i think about how useless and terrible i was during the day.
I start throwing tantrums and shouting at my sister at the littlest mistakes.
I start my little emo sessions, packing my back whilst watching youtube videos.
I get jealous of the girls on youtube, wishing i could be as perfect and musically talented as them.
I blame it all on being fat, and realising that that's the reason no one likes me.
Before going to sleep, I pray to god hoping the next day would go better.
Now repeat this on and on and on.

VOILA, MY LIFE.

Often i try to comfort myself, reassuring myself that im perfect the way i am. it stays that way till i look at myself in a mirror. then im back to square one.

when can i learn to stop hating myself?

someone, help me.